Dethroning Microaggressions

“Where are you really from?”“Which one of your parents is stricter?”“But your English is so good!”“I bet you’re really good in bed.”“How come you don’t have an accent?”“You’re too Asian.”“You’re not Asian enough.”“You must be adopted.”“Well, you don’t look...

Anthony’s Ceiling

“What I ended up feeling when I was talking to girls was that they were systematically disconnected from their bodies, and with boys it was that they were systematically disconnected from their hearts.” – Peggy Orenstein, author of Girls & Sex and Boys & Sex...

Safety & Empowerment for Women of Color

When I think about safety, and how complex that concept can be, I think about the iceberg-depths of what that can mean for women of color, especially those who are survivors of abuse. With the recent surge of the Black Lives Matter Movement, and the suffering we all...

A New Era of Boundary Setting

We are living in dystopic times, to say the least. To be in the present is to live mentally in the future, fearing the consequences of a pandemic whose potential for destruction is vast. For now, many of us are doing our best to heed the warnings from other countries...

The Focus Should Be On Consent, Not Sexual Assault

A consensual encounter where a young woman is kissing another young woman lovingly on the forehead Sexual coercion has been on my mind a lot lately. And one thing I’m realizing is we don’t talk about it enough. Which makes sense–it’s an uncomfortable topic, and...

Girls–It’s Okay to be Rejected

It isn’t just boys who need to learn to hear the word “no.” I’m at a high school teaching our IMPACT:Ability program. We’re about 6 weeks into the program, so we’re starting to address some more uncomfortable topics. This week we’re doing dating scenarios, where...

Safety Tips for Women, Revised

“Don’t talk to strangers.” “Don’t walk alone at night.” “Use your keys as a weapon.” If you live in a body that society views as vulnerable, you have probably been the recipient of many safety tips. Often these are well-meaning, but too often they are also...