Some birthdays are supposed to be milestones: 18, 21, 30, 50, 80, 100. Usually, it’s the ones that come with new legal rights or the ones you can divide by 10.
I’ve been lucky to celebrate a lot of these, but there are times when other milestones mean more. Our students and collaborators experience a lot of these kinds of milestones all the time:
- An assault survivor who feels confident going out at night for the first time in years
- A college student at her first party who has the skills and courage to stop a new friend from leaving a party when she’s too drunk to consent
- A community safety worker who de-escalates a fight, so police aren’t called.
These types of milestones don’t come with a choice of Hallmark cards, so it’s even more important to be intentional about celebrating them.
Last year, I turned 50. Thanks to my sister, we had a party and people I love came in from out of town to celebrate. I felt hopeful and excited when I went to work that Monday, but I also felt that IMPACT had not yet reached a milestone.
IMPACT became an independent organization in July of last year. Deciding to go out on our own took a lot of thought, care, and work. Becoming independent also required me to use a lot of the skills I learned from IMPACT – speaking up for myself and others, navigating my stress response, and trusting that I could be powerful even if I felt fear. When my “milestone” birthday came, the actual circumstances of my life didn’t match the neat round number of my age.
I don’t have anything planned for my 51st birthday later this month, but I am celebrating a milestone. IMPACT has thrived in our first year of independence. Our school and de-escalation programs have grown. Our team – veteran and new—is solid. Our collaborations are generative and productive, and our board is engaged. By this time next year, we will have reached yet another milestone: a completed strategic plan. When I go into work now, I don’t feel like I’m building the plane anymore. Now I get to focus all my energy on flying it.
To mark my 50th birthday, I set a fundraising goal: to engage 50 donors in 50 days. So, from August through October, everyone from my closest friends to people from high school that I only see on social media made donations to IMPACT. And while the milestone birthday gave it a certain ring, IMPACT needs your support just as much in the birthday years you can’t divide by 10. We have not turned away a scholarship application in more than 20 years. This would not be possible without the generosity of our supporters.
So please support a milestone birthday that is just as important to me as the more conventional one I had last year!